You know that Nationwide bank advert with the tubby bloke who works for some hideous, blood-sucking financial institution that’s out to rip off its customers at every twist? We like him a lot for two reasons. Firstly he’s fat and jolly which is a winning combination in any situation that requires a lightening of the mood. Secondly he tells the truth, straight up, no bull. He works for a nasty old corporate money-making behemoth and no doubt earns a crummy salary while his company squirrels away millions of pounds of other people’s money every day. He doesn’t get bitter about it though. He knows he can’t beat the machine, but he won’t let it beat him. He stays chipper and maintains his own integrity by telling customers exactly what’s what, thus enabling them to make a fully informed decision as to whether they wish to patronize his company with their custom.

Naturally they invariably decide against it, like the woman who can barely contain her contempt when our girth-blessed friend explains the need for free-flowing champers at the shareholders’ meeting. So off she toddles round the corner to Nationwide, another vast cash farm that apparently has your best interests at heart but doesn’t have anyone nearly as honest on the front desk to talk you through the many ways they can potentially make money off you.

All of which helpful ranting leads us indirectly onto the news that the Office of Fair Trading has finally stepped in to ask a question the rest of us have been asking for effing years. Namely how come in the information age where data can be disseminated globally in a matter of seconds it still takes banks three to five working days to transfer money from one to another. Well, as you’ve probably worked out for yourself, it doesn’t. They just throw your money into a kind of monetary holding pattern in order to earn interest which tots up to a not inconsiderable £30 million or so a year. Not a bad return for doing sod all but causing the customer inconvenience. It’s the same basic principle as the dodgy cabby who picks up the unsuspecting foreigner and drags them all over the back of beyond before finally delivering them to their destination later than necessary and charging them extra for the privilege.

The banks for their part have rolled up their sleeves with the sheepishness of little boys caught red handed in the midst of nefarious deed-doing and accepted a sharp whack across the wrist while pledging to end this shoddy practice once and for all. From today (27 May) all money transfers from Barclays, Citibank, Clydesdale, Yorkshire, HSBC, Lloyds TSB, Northern Bank and the Royal Bank of Scotland will clear within a maximum of a couple of hours. Ironically Nationwide will not be coming on board with the changes right away. Perhaps if you pop into a branch some helpful soul might be able to explain to you why not.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, May 27th, 2008 at 11:33 am and is filed under General, Mutual Points, Shopping. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.